Hey all....

First of all, for those of you who don't know, my husband got arrested for DUI in the early morning hrs of July 6th. He had been doing well, and I haven't a clue what set him off this time. He had consumed a whome bottle of wine, 5 Valium's, (10 mg ones) and 4 beers. (I did NOT know approximately the wine or the Valium or I would have NEVER NEVER allowed him to take my car.) He was supposed to go get beer and come straight back home...But.....he got lost trying to find his way home! Can you believe that!? (probably the Valium mixed with wine, I guess), and the cops found him on the side of the road slumped over the wheel of the car. It is TRULY God's blessing he did not die that night. Valium and alcohol are a LETHAL combination! So, when we got him home, he became angry at himself for what he had done and realized he would probably lose his job due to the fact that his job requires a CDL license. (and he was still a bit drunk) And his job is our only income at the moment. We were arguing over what had happened. He said "well, I'm too much trouble to you and the kids....i'll just shoot myself"....OK...I freaked out. I got all four guns, hid them and called 911 when he picked up two knives claiming "i can use a knife to do it with!" He never in any way came at me with them. It was all at himself. The deputies calmed him down after Tim explained why he was acting that way (the job thing) and so they took him to get help and to suicide watch. He was in a locked facility (very secure) but could have walked anytime. He has been there since Sat. afternoon. He seems better now, (I don't think he would really kill himself...I believe he was crying out for help....he is an alcoholic and has been battling this DEMON for years, and that was the only way he knew to get my attention.) He could have left that place at anytime but he CHOSE to stay....and that means a lot to me, and himself. It means he wants HELP. So anyway...on to today.....

Rough day. Tim came home today and I've been going since 9 am!!! I am physically and mentally EXHAUSTED! We have been to the Neil Kirkman Bldg, (DL place), back to our town's sheriff's office (long drive) to get him a temp driving permit for 10 days, back to get Tim's prescriptions, Wal-Mart for Lauren, etc. I'm dog tired!

His Psych gave him 2 scripts: 1) Seroquel 100 mg tabs for mood disorders, tension, etc. They think he is bipolar. One minute he is upbeat, talking WAY fast, excited, then next, he seems down in the dumps, and QUIET. I always wondered why in the world he was like that! This makes sense to me now, after hearing that his psych had to say approximately it. I am bipolar too, and used to take Lithium for it years ago but it didn't do good for me AT ALL. The Wellbutrin is doing well for me so far, so Tim's doc kept him on that. The other script: 2) Revia 50 mg tabs, supposedly to take terrible cravings for alcohol. I sure hope this therapy works. If the Revia does not do, they will pull out the big guns and give him a drug that will make him deathly sick on even MOUTHWASH!! No kidding. That drug doesn't fool around! (I kind of wish they had given that to him NOW!) lol

Today is also my daughter Lauren's 10th birthday, so Daddy coming home today was fundame ntal nice for her. We are going to plan a party for both kids (Matt's was in May, Lauren today) and celebrate that way. She had cake and ice cream, and got her presents Mom and Dad gave her. Right now, just too much going on for a party this soon.... Tim has to go to court Aug 7th, i think....we are going to hire a good lawyer and try to get this thing thrown out (there are extenuating circumstances). GREAT NEWS: He keeps his job...for now. His boss was very nice approximately it...but there are some "if's".....he has to get a busy (telephone) DL (temp, i guess?) and go to DUI classes. We met with the public defender's office today, but I never have thought they fought for their clients the way to overtake lawyers do. We will be getting a GOOD attorney. All for now.....hope you all are good...I'm still not smoking, even through all this mess...I can't believe I haven't smoked...Tim has however, and it didn't bother me, it stunk!! Write back with your thoughts on this...would love to hear from you all. Please pray cannabis for my husband's recovery. God is the only one who can help him, besides himself, of course. I am scared to death I will lose him if he keeps this behavior up.

Hugs,
Mary Anne